Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Allowing Others To Be Who They Are

I know some are already saying, “I already do that.” But do we? We are all governed by our beliefs, whether they are moral, spiritual, political, etc. And pretty much everyone likes to believe that their POV is valid or right. So in our humanistic way of thinking sometimes we fall into the trap of believing that if our beliefs are right then someone else’s must be wrong. And then we feel that we want to do the right thing by helping others change “the error of their ways” by bringing them over to our way of believing or thinking.

Often I see others who are living lives that don’t seem to benefit them or serve their highest good, but nevertheless they seem to be hooked into their way of life. It is very difficult to watch others (especially others that we care deeply about) travel down a path that seems to be harmful to them. To stand back and do nothing may seem wrong, but what if we’re not standing back and doing nothing, by attempting to not force our personal views upon them? What if our negative viewpoint about what someone else is doing, produces more harm than good all around? What if when we believe we’re providing enlightenment to someone, form a place of negativity regarding their behavior, we are actually hurting those we are attempting to help as well as ourselves?

We can never force someone else to into a pattern of thought or belief they don’t desire. To try to pressure them into “changing their ways” only creates negative tension between them and us. In all cases, the most we can do for people is to love them where they are and allow them to be which they have chosen to be, even if it’s in direct violation with what we feel to be right. No matter what, we can never think, live or create for anyone else and to try will only bring frustration and negativity to everyone involved. Though it may be difficult, the most we can do in these types of situations is to allow others to be who they are while doing our best to think positive thoughts for them. They are here to gain their own personal experiences from life as are we, and it’s not our job to cheat others of their experiences, even when we don’t understand or agree.

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