Other People’s Opinions

From personal experience I know that a good deal of us (maybe all at one point or another) spend a lot of time viewing ourselves from the viewpoint of someone else. You disagree? What about our parents, significant others, bosses, even our children? Do we not do things to keep them happy? Do we not look into our actions to see if they would be acceptable to others? And what about the idea of respect? Is it more important to behave in a manor that we think will earn us respect from others or in a manner that is, more aimed toward self respect… and don’t say both. What if the opportunity arises where it has to be one or the other, how would most of us choose?

Yes I do realize we live in a world with other people and we want to give some consideration to that knowledge, but how much? I have seen too many, live life practically looking over their shoulders. “I can’t behave in this manner, because someone else won’t approve.” And most of the time these behaviors won’t cause any harm to us, or the others surrounding us. Still, we refuse to follow what we want because it’s unpopular or frowned upon for who knows what reason? Should the opinions of others matter that much that we stifle our true selves under a blanket of false security? “If I behave this way then people will like me or respect me.” Well, excuse me if I’m inclined to disagree.

If people really want to, they will search until they find a reason not to like us. Worse, there is nothing we can do about it. We can bend over backwards trying to make ourselves into an acceptable person according to other people’s standards, but that doesn’t guarantee they’ll like us. Moreover, why does it matter so much? If we truly love ourselves for who we are, then wouldn’t we spend more time trying to be the people we think we should be, instead of what someone else thinks we should be? If we truly cared about our own personal wellbeing wouldn’t we nourish and care for ourselves in a manner that’s best for us? When we really take a moment to think about it, what is the true reason we care so much what other people think? Is their opinion really that important in the grand scheme of things? Can they live our lives for us? Is someone else to be the judge of what’s best for us when they can’t even walk in our shoes? There is a fine line between taking healthy advice from others who care for us and letting someone else run our lives for their best interest. Just a little food for thought.  

Love,