Progress... Or Whatever.

I once read, that progress is more synonymous to moving two steps forward and one step back, VS the straight forward motion a lot of us have come to expect. To be honest my human mind often finds this process most annoying, I mean really, why do I gotta' go backward at all? *Appalled* Totally a breeding ground for frustration. When I've hurtled a milestone, the last thing I want to do is find myself, somehow, standing in front of THAT SAME EXACT MILESTONE! I mean really, what is that? How unfair?! Who wants to backtrack when they can just keep on trucking, right? (OK tantrum over... maybe)

Well ... over the course of time I have come to realize that hearing “progress” defined or explained in these terms was actually kind of validating (Have I lost my mind? Well maybe, but that's beside the point... just this one time). In retrospect, there have been SO many times when I've felt like a miserable failure at life (harsh, yeah I know), staying in the same spot, having no apparent growth, just down on myself, hard on myself for seemingly repeating the same crap over and over (Wait... did I say something even remotely close to LIKING this process? I must be a glutton for punishment... *sigh*).

Even with all the mighty mountains of frustration caused by growth, it feels even just a little bit better, knowing that regardless of the seemingly repetitive nature of my experiences, I AM actually moving forward. The notion that I am in some ways handling the events of my life, even slightly, better than before is somehow encouraging. Imagine that. And you know what else? After a while of handling things in a more productive manner, those repetitive situations somehow seem to just diminish into nonexistence.

I wonder why that might be? ;)

Just a little something to think about.

Love,